Mu, I was once told that a gift should reflect where your relationship is, not where you want it to be. My r is gone, even though I want a happy m, so I am getting her nothing.
35 3 boys Not my circus, not my monkeys anymore....
Jpeg, I've become bitter thinking of the things I've made, the time I've spent, the effort I put forth and for what? To hear don't make me anything else. If I am making these things for her out of love I feel for her and she says that. What does that mean? The way I feel right now I want to gather it all up and throw it away. I made wood and metal chachkies, picture frames, wooden sculpture, metal wall art and outdoor metal sculpture. I bought a outdoor swing bed with beautiful cushions and hung it from a large sycamore tree in our yard.I then planted flower beds all around it. She has no interest in any of it or me I guess.
I don't want to give her a gift. I want to take them all away.
Mutatio don't be bitter- be better! Keep making your gifts but for your kids. My dad was a carver and some of my most cherished things are the various carvings I have from him (loons and figurines, candle sticks and bowls- things like that). Theses are things our kids will remember you by and pass down for generations. What amazing gifts to give!!! Make them for your children and they will be cherished
Thank you Jpeg. I feel better now and I will follow your advice. I was felling sorry for myself and vented. I wear my heart on my sleeve.
I don't understand how your husband or any of the husbands could treat their wifes so disgracefully. A women that loves you, wants to work to save the marriage, what a gift. Jpeg please remember its not you, it's him. You are a beautiful soul and deserve better then this.
For me gifts are for giving so it is the giver who decides. I have struggled this year each occasion to decide if I wanted to give something. So far I have always wanted to so I did.
Christmas may be the first time I decide not to. I don't like my W too much lately though I love her a lot.
Best wishes
R 25 years M 14 years S11 & S13 Working on it alone since Oct 2014 M in trouble a lot earlier (~2 years) Feb 2016. 1st R chat in a yr. Next R chat Aug'17 Still together
I'll put it like this. Your workplace has fired you; you're surplus to requirements. Would you send them a Christmas card/gift? It's gonna be hard. You guys in the US do Thanksgiving as well as Christmas/New Year, so it's another heartache for you to fall in to.
Seriously, the action of not giving her a gift will weigh more on her mind than yours.
I don't post often on your thread as you're doing well. I do read though. Keep going.
M 45 W 52 SD22 S9 D8 BD 6 April 2015 Not living together 4 Dec 2015