dday, attempting to find clarity

[dday]

I agree with you mutatio. I worry about my W a lot. And my kids. Something has happened between us, and I can no longer read her. She has became a pretty good actress lately. Making me second guess everything.

I know that everyone tells us to detach. I'm not sure that you do it. I believe a lot of it just happens over time.

In a sick way, I believe her statement of "I don't respect you" is helping me. Making me see things in a different light. It explains how she can do these things to our family. It stems from her not forgiving me over a comment made during a drunken argument years ago. I can't regain her respect unless she forgives. The comment has made me look at her actions differently, and the timing of everything. I see now, finally, that she isn't ready to work on us because she isn't done working on her.


I have to give her back the divorce paperwork, with my notes. I was supposed to Wednesday, but I didn't want to ruin thanksgiving for anyone. The last 14 years together comes down to 7 pages. Painful