Thanks for your thoughts Zues. It has been six weeks and I'm slowly trying to find a balance that works for me and S. Today he is going to spend some time shopping with W. I want to try to GAL. This week I learnt a bit of cooking. Next week after son goes I have four days holiday which I intend to use to breathe and think what I want to do for me. I'm going to prepare a proposal for separation of finances just to be ready for when/if the day comes. Sort out the flat, pack away the books she didn't take with her but most of all take some time to work on me. I don't text and hasn't seen W since she blew my a kiss a week ago! She seems to be in a fantasy world. She texted this morning to complain I hadn't forwarded a letter earlier, I said she still had time to join her course and I was busy making meatballs. She texted why didn't you tell me. I could have made some for you! I didn't reply. Yesterday when we spoke one thing she mentioned was taking me clothes shopping in the January sales! S has agreed to meet her for breakfast before his 10 day trip, to avoid her turning up at the station in front of his friends and their families. I think she thinks I'll be breakfasting as well but I think I'll give it a miss. I'm reading the LRT and GAL advice but it is hard to deal with a W who has little physical contact with us but then is capable of trying to behave like nothing has happened when both S and I have made it clear to her that she broken the family unit. S said to me clearly"why should I want to spend time with her now when she never spent time with me before". Of course I still love her despite all the pain she has caused but I can't be doing things with her as if the OM doesn't exist. I've given up the classes to avoid having the same conversations with her and the physical contact. She clearly wants to be more in our lives but I've told I can't play happy families when he's working or out with friends. She doesn't want him there at larger family gatherings at the moment.says I am still part of the larger family. I said I'm not substituting for him. To she just says it isn't like that and other exes do. Judging by texts and yesterday's conversation she still doesn't get it. I notice the texts disappear when OM is around!
