Striving to keep the peace within

[mleigh4]

Hello all and Happy Thanksgiving.

I just dropped off my son with H. S and I had a great start to our day with a big breakfast. S is not happy to have had to leave and is not happy to be going to FIL but we are looking forward to our own meal together tomorrow.

Not much to update on H other then he seems to be in a real confused state lately. Interaction and trying to coordinate things with him this last week have been truly exhausting. He also has been having those moments of a bunch of chit chat texting, then back to total silence.

This morning I got the Happy Thanksgiving and the last minute invite to his dad's, he said he wanted to make sure I knew I was welcome to go. I started out with a Happy Thanksgiving back and a thanks but I already made plans. I also added a truth dart that of course I did not think I was invited. That when I had asked him about the holiday all I got was silence. Then told him what time I could have son over to him. I had to say something, nothing he has said recently was an invite with them, but I kept it light and friendly.

He said he was sorry, that he did not remember me asking if I could go but that he would have told me I was welcome to go.

I clarified, no I never asked to go, I asked his thoughts on how to spend the holiday and got nothing...

And once again, I got nothing. It's like talking to a rock, there is just nothing there. So I dropped off S, we were both very friendly. I told S to save some room in his tummy for tomorrow. H asked me what is tomorrow? I said, it's my Thanksgiving meal with S. He looked so dang confused you guys.

I told him all of this by text when we set the plans. I truly don't know how he is functioning at work because what little I deal with him, he seems totally out of it. I really believe he is confused about why the day has been split and why we are doing things separate. I think he truly believed everything was going to go down like normal. The look of confusion on his face said it all. I have no words for it really other than it is just so bizarre. It's like he doesn't understand what is happening or why.

I am heading to my friends ranch now for dinner, wine and board games. I am so looking forward to it, I even get to bring my dog! We will see how tomorrow goes. I still feel pangs of guilt for not inviting H to me and S Thanksgiving feast tomorrow, but I think S and I are better off doing it alone.

I hope you all have love in your lives today. Enjoy