Reading your post I was seeing where you were taking it or would let it take you given the chance.
I made a joke yesterday about the term WLBS (Wayward Left Behind Spouse) but it is no joke.
When S checks out, especially with A, we at some stage become vulnerable around interested women. Our faithfulness is then only as good as our options.
If you want your R to work... concentrate on it. If you want out then get out and start fishing.
Believe me, if you ever did get involved with an OW whilst handling a S you do not want and also trying to keep it from S you would end up totally drained, lose perspective and question your original goals.
Problem is... if that does not work out and S finds out ... Imagine situation you will be in. You would have turned the tables overnight, become the bad guy and ... even though you try and blame her as the cuase, deep down you will know the truth and have to live with it.
