. I understand your feelings and I can't say you are wrong to feel that way. You are surely right about what you think. Trust your gut. But never act on feelings alone.
You need to step back and decide what you want. It is so normal to want to barge in and say enough is enough. But you need to really know what you want and act accordingly. If you really want out, go in hell for leather and worry about the fallout later.
But if you want to keep your family together think before you act. There is lots of advice on internet about how to confront EA. How you approach it can affect the outcome.
R 25 years M 14 years S11 & S13 Working on it alone since Oct 2014 M in trouble a lot earlier (~2 years) Feb 2016. 1st R chat in a yr. Next R chat Aug'17 Still together