It's natural to question your sanity when Dr. Jekyll turns into Mr. Hyde... You have an emotional attachment to him (or to the man he used to be), he doesn't seem to have any to you (or at least not in his current state of mind), and you didn't share in the process that brought him there, so you're left shell-shocked.

It's what so many of us describe as 'my S has been posessed by aliens', 'I don't know him/her anymore' - but it's not something you think can happen to you or your S.

To protect yourself, you have to be constantly aware that he's not looking out for you right now. He's not the man he used to be. Which is so sad, but real.

Talk to your L about the savings so you know what the likely outcome is. Also check if infidelity/desertion matters in your state. And remember that if H has retirement accounts through work, those will also be counted if your savings are counted. Savings of any kind will be part of the settlement, not support calculation.

Basically, get as much info you can so you know what to expect.

M 16 yrs, WH62, P54
3 adult blended kids
EA 11/13, BD1 6/14
PA fall 14, BD2 2/15
Piecing 2015, BD3 12/15
Separated 4/16
WH moved OW in 5/16
Divorced 6/15/17