On Saturday we had a little photo shoot for my D3 in my home country's dress which celebrates rite of passage. I let H know he is welcomed to come see her and take pictures. H showed up late and spent only 30min. D3 was happy to see him. D3 looked very pretty and had fun. I am very grateful that she is a healthy happy kid.
Last night he came to see the kids for about 1.5h, but mostly we talked about the daycare arrangement. It turns out the time might not work for us. I'm sure H will keep looking for another one because he really seems to want to be free from kids during the day. (To get another job and/or free time ) H agreed to pay anything more than our current childcare cost.
SIL is a stay home mom and always supportive on the emergency stiches, so I can drop the kids off with her if necessary. I used to be reluctant since I know she has her life too, but not anymore.
I agree with you Sotto. At this point I have no choice but to let go of H. He has no interest in kids or me or family life at this moment and H has to see himself where his "ideal" "free" life will take him.
I believe if we are meant to be, we will find our path back to each other. Till then, I will be the best mom and find out who I want to be.
