In the UK - need help (pt15)

[Huddy]

Time to start sorting out the financials of the move. For our entire relationship, I have dealt with everything, from writing the cheques to paying money in, to sorting out finance. Maybe that is something W feels aggrieved about, but that's how she wanted it. Like most people, we have made some bad financial decisions over the years (buying a lousy car etc.), but, we've always found a way.

Yesterday, I started going through all our papers and dividing things in to piles for each of us. Once I'd finished, I told W that it was all in a box for her. W used this as a time to start making noises about her lack of financial muscle. At first, it was about getting her mail re-directed (in the UK, you can choose to get your mail moved on for £30 for 3 months) and I agreed she could have it sent to my new address, and she would pick it up every now and then. She said she didn't know my address (it's written on the calendar in the kitchen) and that she might not 'have anywhere to go'. I validated but said nothing more. W then went for the 'I'm not going to have any money, and I've so much to pay out' line (I've read this in so many sitches on here). Again I validated, but I had pointed this out to her in May and I really can't believe that she hasn't thought about it until now.

Lastly, it appears her 'support network' (Mum, sister, brothers) have let her down. I asked if they were coming to help her move and she said they couldn't, because they were working. Inside me, I wanted to say 'I told you they'd let you down', but I said nothing. It's up to my W to realise that I'm not plan B - I only want to be plan A.