I think that whether you contributed to the breakdown or not does not change the fact that you need to have someone looking out for you. Being amicable does not mean rolling over. It means that you want what is fair. You want your marriage in tact and your kids to be provided for. If he is bailing on the first part of this requires a certain safety net to ensure the second piece is not being neglected.
If his claim is that he is unhappy in the marriage so financially you should struggle to meet the needs of your children, what does that say to you about the kind of person he is? You can be amicable by having a lawyer determine what is fair and explaining to H where the money is going. Legally I don't think you owe him that much explanation but it might make it easier to have an amicable relationship if you disclose that. If he has a problem with that then you know he isn't trying to be amicable, and you won't be able to negotiate with him.
The money is for your children, not for you.
40s 2teens M14Y BD-10/12/13 rec-1/14 BD2-5/14 rec2-9/14 EA disc-10/14 4/15-BD 3 and triangulation ensues Served with D6/15 MS forced to leave7/15 D agreement signed 8/16 final 5/17
