A new thread for Eye-Tie

[EyeTie]

Thank you PigPen.

There are days when I do feel bad for her. I know she is struggling to find her place and is unsure of her future. I know that the life she has is not the one she visioned when she left. I know that she regrets her decision (although she will never admit it). I know that me being happy is destroying her, since she is so miserable. But at the end of the day, this was her decision to make. Not mine. I love her, I always will, but this time around ILYBNILWY is how I feel about her.

My WW has said that we outgrew one another over the years. I didn't realize how true that was until a few months ago when I saw her one Sunday morning. She was out at the bar both Friday/Saturday night, her complexion looked like crap, she was in a crabby mood and I realized right then and there that I would rather have a night in with my kids than a night out at the bars with people I don't care about.

Part of her issue is that we did get together when she was young. She was 18, pregnant by the time she was 21 and "missed out" on going out with her friends. It was a compromise that we discussed at great lengths. So now that we are no longer a couple, she has the freedom to do such, I don't think she expected it to come at such a high cost.

I am not bitter, angry or hateful towards her. I hope she figures out her life and finds happiness. When this all started I used to pray that she would come back. Several times a day in fact. Now I pray that she finds happiness that I could not provide to her.

Through out this whole ordeal, I have realized a lot about life. When I got sick last winter and was told that I may have 5 months to live, it put things into an incredible perspective. I made a plan and said "If I live, this is what I am going to do". #1 was be the best father I can be. #2 was taking nothing in life for granted. #3 was let go of the things I can't change. Who I was a year ago and who I am now are completely different people and I couldn't be happier. I lost my wife in the process, but I also walked away from several friendships that were negative influences in my life. I like my life now. I am happy. And I hope that all of you DBers find the same happiness that I have fount. Good luck.