These ups and downs are the worst... loving someone who picked someone else in an EA/PA even 1 physical time is dibilitating. I keep pushing physically with workouts, jiu jitsu etc... Last night I taught a jiu jitsu class and I felt great after! euphoric! Then as I sit, while she's upstairs and it percolates.. then I'm trying to sleep and all I see is IT. SMH + FML Lol... We have counseling tomorrow and frankly, I know we need to go but there's times where I say i don't know, I know forgetting is the worst. Wanting to shake this and just move forward is tough. I've been writing my log and writing more songs than I've written in a long time. I see a lot of time playing my guitar and tracking these lyrics.. As my buddy said (we're friends on a forum, don't know him face to face but he's been through this) "the hardest part is the time alone, the time it's just you. When you're at work, or driving to/from work (I have an 1:15hr drive) where it beats you up. We're doing the right things and I Pray that they work out.
