I am going to be quite honest. There are still some of the more damning things that I have hidden away and really don't know why I haven't gotten rid of everything. Someone once told me that by keeping that kind of stuff is setting up the marriage to fail if she does decide to come back - as in the trust still hasn't returned. Made sense to me. But, I don't know why I still have it. I don't want to go the bargaining chip way and I guess I held onto to it for so long because part of me tells me that she may really get nasty if she does go ahead with the divorce.
Guess that is no reason, eh? I would never hurt my W in any form and I realize that keeping that stuff - if she ever found it - would be the undoing. I haven't looked at it in months, and honestly forgot about it.
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I am in a forgiving mood today. A conversation I had recently left me thinking more about my actions and faults in my M. I feel giving in and giving up is the likely next step. That may change tomorrow so for now I will do nothing.
I forgave my W months ago - but she thinks there are trust issues between us. I don't know how to get past that, any advice? Everyday I feel like giving up, but I think of my family - and my W - and how much I love them. And I continue to put one foot in front of the other and go another day. What other choice is there?
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
