Yesterday w phoned an hour and half before class to say she was nearby and could she come in to see us. S15 didn't want her coming by surprise so I met her in a bar nearby. I explained that it was uncomfortable to receive surprise visits. She told me that she had been to a talk given by a psychologist about kids and divorce. ( which is ironic considering she stopped going to hers when she was told things she didn't want to here). She wanted to do things as a family. I told her that we weren't a family since she left. She said we are a different model of family. I disagreed and we left it there. I talked about things I and S had been doing. She wanted to see photos from my race which surprised me. I told her some of my plans, cooking class etc.She is filling her life with courses and activities but we didn't talk about r or OM. When I mentioned S wanted to try sushi she tried to arrange a meal at a new Japanese restaurant but I gently said no. In the end I stopped the conversation by saying I was going back to see son as he was still recovering from fever. She said she was tired and wouldn't go either. Leaving she gave me a kiss and a long hug, commenting on the fragrance I was wearing, two more kisses and goodbye. I don't read anything into it. I don't feel too bad as I haven't made any plans for her to be with us. S and I will continue on with our lives. I can't change the difficulties in her life. She knows what I think, only she can change herself.
