I'm so happy the book is making sense to you. It helped me a lot, too. I was surprised to discover that I really am awful at asking for what I need. I was a manipulator! I would hint, sigh, dance all the way around a subject...for fear of being told "no", I guess.
What is so very wrong with, "Can you take out the trash?" Too easy, I guess. For me, it was an ordeal:
Me: "Wow. The trash can is really full." Sigh. (Offer to take it out, H.) H: "Yes, it is." (Here we go again. Why won't she just ask?) Me: "I'm not sure I can fit anything else in there." (Offer to take the trash out, H.) H: Sigh. (She needs to ask!) "I think if you push down on the top of the pile, you can make some more room in there." Me: Huff. Sigh. (Why won't he offer to take it out?) "I pushed it down a while ago. I think it's really full now." H: (This will get her going.) "Did you use a pan or something, to really smoosh it down?" (Keeps straight face.) Me: "Screw you, H! I guess I'll be the man around here and take out the trash!" H: (Like taking candy from a baby. Quiet snicker.) "Ok. You do that."
I learned some good stuff reading that book. I'm so proud of you, G.
