in house S (4)

[vise82]

Hey,

Now back to reality. The wedding is over, she didn't run off with the best man. She thinks he is good looking but because of her bad self image she feels he wouldn't want her. This give me hope.

She was on a path of loosing weight and looking better but she has gone away from that. She sabotaged her own chance to be more attractive for this guy.

I have been on a path of looking good and loosing weight and I have lost some. Now my wedding ring wont stay on my finger. I haven't been on a scale yet but my belt needs to be done up using the hole that I used to use before I was married. Not going to the inlaws on sunday has helped me loose weight as there was just so much food. Playing soccer now has helped me loose weight. Walking/running with the dog has helped me loose weight. Now soccer is getting easier to play as I am not as winded as I was on the first game I played.

I am getting really close to going to work out, to get stronger. Mentally I think I am almost there.

I was wearing my old fall jacket and my kid tells me it looked terrible like I was wearing a large blanket. I grabbed the ends of the jacket and it wrapped me up. It was way to big for me. He was right, I was swimming in it. I am going to have to get a new jacket.

I get my hair cut more now, trying to look my best. This is something in the past I put very little effort to. Now its once a month. It doesn't hurt the girl cutting it is nice looking.

The book I read NMMNG, says I need more male friends, so I am going to be more friendly to my new neighbor.

I already put the Christmas lights up on the house. Last year I would feel that everyone was watching me do so I hesitated away from it. I cant be worried what other people think, If I think I should do it I do it now.

W got up late this morning and I made a point of say good morning to her. Not more waiting to see if she says it to me first. Also I hugged and told my kids I loved them openly and loud as I left for work, I am proud of them why say it softly so no one hears. Then as I left I said good bye to my W properly with a strong voice not the half asking soft good byes I would say before.

I plan to have a good day today