Time, time passing and having no contact or word from my H is making things easier.
I'm trying very hard to throw myself into my own life (and my own work). I've always been completely overshadowed by my H's career and his personality too (he's a total extrovert...loves being with people and bringing people together).
I feel like I'm starting to come out of his shadow a bit.
I'm finding the more I am present with people, and give myself genuinely to them and what they are bringing to the conversation, the more they are warming to me and are drawn to me.
I'm trying very hard not to worry about where my H might be, or what he might be doing. I can now manage big swathes of time without him crossing my mind. I can sleep a bit better and don't feel so overwhelmed all the time. I can have a conversation with other people without feeling any need to talk about what has happened/is going on
I've noticed that my H's bank statements are still coming to our house. He's not one who is interested in the practicalities of life and dealing with its responsibilities, so this doesn't surprise me. But he's self employed, so he needs his banks statements to do his tax return. Anyway, that's not my concern, is it? It's his.
However much I love my H, I need to remind myself that I love life more. So I won't be dragged into his chaos and dragged down by what he's going through. I mustn't, for my own sake.
