No she hasnt offered nothing. She says that "I am not mentally stable to see them" because one week im blaming myself for the fall out and the next week im blaming her as well. For that reason I am not mentally stable to see them. She wanted for me to sign what ever paper she had and take it to court and let the judge decide my visitation then i would be able to see them. I have txt her before all this , if i could pick them up at such time and would return them such time , but she never answered. When she lived in the shelter would allow for me to see them, that was 5 weeks while she was living there. I am just waiting on my L now to get emergency custody.
/sigh. I was hoping reading those two books would have you start seeing how your actions have contributed to the situation. It seems your still not ready to see.
She offered you a way to talk to them in the beginning and you abused it to try and get her back, talk to.her, shame her. She tried to sit down with you and work out a visitation schedule and you jumped up on your mighty high horse and acted like a fool.
I can see why she would say the comment about you being stable. Your version of the events vary wildly from the version we see when you post text conversations.
What did you get from reading the books, any realizations about your actions recently or from the past?
Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be
My first interaction when she first left, i screwed it up when talking to them on the phone and then i flipped it around by telling her she was depressed and needed help for going into a shelter , after that she didnt let me talk to them , that was the last time i hear about my girls
second time she text me 5 weeks later , she wants a divorce etc, but she wants me to sign what ever ppwk she has and take it to court and have the judge arrange visitation , after the court i would be able to see them. ( do you think i trust her fog?) after all this time she took my daughters away, do you think i trust her little ppwk she wanted for me to sign. No. Too late, ill get my L and do it the right way where I can get all my father rights.
I don't know if these are typos or if you are so caught up in this that you don't see the reality? If you read your last two posts, you said that she allowed you to see your daughters during the 5 weeks she lived in the shelter. Your very next post you say you talked to the once and then she texted you 5 weeks later. You are either trying to confuse us or don't know the story yourself.
Please take this 2x4 with a grain of salt, I'm not trying to be a d*ck. Just pointing out the inconsistencies.
Me 34, XF 27 Many years together Son 4 Engaged Not engaged Many false starts by XF 7/16 new girlfriend comes into my life 2/17 girlfriend moves in my home
no that was a typo.sorry she wouldnt allow me to see them when she was at the shelter. it's 9 weeks now and i still havent heard from them.
I understand that the first week she left i messed up by telling her she needed help,pleading her, begging, etc. right after i hung up the phone with my daughter. I havent heard from them since.
she says that im not mentally stable because 1 week im blaming myself for the downfall the next week im trying to blame her as well. I can understand that , sometimes the emotional roller coaster did take the best of me.
Are the books finished or are you still on them? Any other revelations while/after reading those two?
The next book to read would be 'The Solo Partner' when you get a chance.
Don't just rush through the books either, really do some soul searching while you go through them and think how they could relate to you. Not only recent events but over your whole M and relationship. The point isn't just to finish it but to gain something from it.
Last edited by Fogg; 11/15/1510:16 PM.
Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be
Please don't stop posting because I'm giving you more tough love than anything. I might be coming off as a dick at times and I do apologize. I can just see so much of my own M and issues in your sitch and I want to help you. I honestly do want you and your M to succeed.
How are things going? Did you get to see your daughters yet? Any other developments since last month?
Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be
Fogg , no not at all I dont mind you speaking truth into me since that's what i need. Thanks for checking up on me and truly wanting my marriage to succeed. It means the world to me that someone i personally havent met wnts my marriage to succeed. Not even my family offers such positive vibes. And in all honestly i need a the help i can get. I just had to take a break from this site , it was becoming a daily routine for me to get on this website and just read everyones stitch. Unfortunately i am on the 12th week tomorrow 12/07 and i have yet to see my daughters 3 months!! It's killing me inside. I wish i would have filed with my L sooner. It has been 4 weeks since she filed all ppwk but holidays have delayed things. But hopefully next week we have a definite court date and have her served.
As far as i am concerned , I have reached a point in my life that i never thought i would reach. I have realized i dont need my wife in my life. I have been at peace this past month. I dont worry about her anymore, I dont miss her. I love her and I wish she was with me , but i dont need her to be happy. Only time will tell what happens next. Holidays sucked but I will be fine.I know I will.
