I met a girl when i was 19. She was 18 at the time. We were pretty good friends for the year we shared in college. She confided in me, hat she had been raped five times by different men. I was shocked and amazed how well she was considering. She was a tough and strong yet gentle character. She said she would not change her past as it made her the person she was then. This is totally irrelevant to your situation but it goes to show different people react differently. Don't assume the faith or your marriage because of statistics. Maybe your W will be part of the few that can function fully in a R.
I have never met your W and I feel bad for her. Guess I care about others and this was enhanced by going through my situation. You too have enormously throughout this process, but you are aware of that.
I wish you well, my friend
R 25 years M 14 years S11 & S13 Working on it alone since Oct 2014 M in trouble a lot earlier (~2 years) Feb 2016. 1st R chat in a yr. Next R chat Aug'17 Still together