Time to let go ....How (4)

[Enigma]

Hi OTW,

Just want to say as I've caught up on your S, I think you've done a tremendous job. This is not easy by any means, and you being a great father (to which your kids have a great bond with you) during this difficult time speaks volumes. I just wanted to convey this.

For me, I am busy doing things around the house to put my own touch on things. went and watched football with some friends the other night. I am having some upgrades done to my truck that I have wanted. I know i need to tighten up with money as i am now going to be paying a hefty support each month. This will be an interesting time getting used to the money situation.

I have also created a list of things i am going to start doing for myself, but honestly i feel i am occupied trying to get a handle on schedules and handling everything with the household i have not started yet. I am going to make a better effort after i get back from the weeding this weekend. I have mixed feelings about this wedding. He is one of my best friends. He was the best man in my wedding, now i am going there without my W. feels wrong.

I ma having a difficult time keeping her off my mind lately. It isnt as painful as seeing her everyday and wondering what is going on, but now i am wondering what is going on now that she does not have to worry about me watching over things or being around. I know this will get easier. I am going to really limit the interaction for a while as i feel the conversation regarding the kids wasnt the most positive, not that it was bad, but it wasnt the best.

I need to get out of her mind for a while. Wish i knew what she actually was thinking though.

I went through the in-house separation, then my W moving out just over a month ago. It has taken several weeks for adjusting to this new life. With your putting your own touches to your home, and spending time GAL really does help in the initial period.

But I do share that thinking of W more often than not was common for me as well, although that has lessened slightly. As you focus on you and the kids with W not hanging around, you will likely find you think of her less and less based on your enjoyment with kids. When you don't have kids, GAL is awesome again to take your mind from wandering. You appear to be on this track anyways which is great.

Again I know difficult, but try not to let your mind wander too much at the wedding and have fun.

One thing that helps me get through dark times is thinking what I am grateful for after I have allowed myself to feel my negative emotion. My S2 is definitely where I start and then I find myself with a bit of a smile.

Take care.