Working on improving Ghost

[ATPeace]

Hello

So I have been reading the abused abuser thread and I really do not see that I have been an abuser I guess my W feels different in light of the things that she hi lighted in the book that she was reading

My main position is as I have mentioned before is as followed

My wife and I have only ever been with each other
We met when she was 15
Got married when she was 22
We have had four children together the eldest is 17 and the youngest is only 2

She told me she wanted to separate and that she would not be changing her mind ...she has reinforced this several times

She is not the kind of person that would change her mind during our marriage she was firm with children and would rarely back down once she had said no to them

For the past five months I have been trying my best to make changes to ghost so he becomes a better person I have spent much more the with our children by changing my working hours so I can see them every day before work and I get home shortly after they get home from school so I am able to take them to their activities.

I am doing considerably more arround the house with regard to family chores.

I am being caring and thoughtful and kind at all times
Tried to understand the feelings of my W I have maintained loving feelings towards her whilst trying to give her space and respect her decision.

I have tried desperately hard to keep a connection together by conversation and spending time with my seporated W in the hope fond memories could return .

I have suggested we go away on a family holiday my youngest has never been abroad but my W s scared to fly and even more so with the recent terrorist strikes I would love nothing more than to make her first holiday one with both mummy and daddy .

I would have given my left arm for a reconciliation

I have snooped destroying her trust in me

And recently I have found that she believes I am contoling and abusive

I do not want to separate but I do not have control over this

It's time to keep walking

Small steps

I am feeling strong

Thank you for your comments and support
Kind regards
Ghost