Wow, mind is blown 10

[Uphill]

I will add that I did surprisingly keep my cool. I just didn't hold back anything I have been thinking. I put everything in my mind into words, makes my chest feel a little bit lighter but my heart a little heavier... I was stern with all of my thoughts. I also asked a few questions. I did however mess up by telling her that I still care about her. I'll add more later as I'm still trying to comprehend all that was said

[vise82]

Hey uphill,

So sorry to hear your going through this.

Keep posting as it helps a lot of people.

My W has a wedding to go to and this is the type of thing I am fearing.

I feel it a line for me as well. You should continue to DB just for you.

[Uphill]

I will continue, I'm just not sure which path I will be on... As of yesterday I was done. After the convo earlier today I would say I am not 100% done but it is time for decisions to be made. Through the conversation XF mention how her world is crumbling worse than ever and she realizes that everything she blamed on me was wrong. The problems still exist. As far as OM, I think that was her way of escaping reality? Thought that he would make it all better and he didn't. That is the part I am hung up on though. It makes me sick to the stomach to even think about...

[Uphill]

At one point I asked her "who is the one person who never turned thier back on you or fkd you over?" Silence. So after what seemed like 10 minutes I heard her crying and I said "go ahead, say it". She said the uphill was the only person she ever had like that. It felt good to hear but words mean nothing to me at this point. Action does.

[gonegrl]

I am sorry, U. That video would tear me up too. I want to tell you to try not to think about it, but I know that isn't realistic. I can tell you are a great dad and your son is lucky to have you. I am sorry your son was ignored, and I am sorry for your pain. This is all so hard but you are on the right path towards healing.

[Uphill]

Thanks for stopping by pho!

Wish me luck and patience fellow DBers. XF wants to talk face to face tonight. It will either be really good or really bad as I see no middle ground at this point...

[Azzork]

I'm sorry to read about the UH.

Just want to say that it's interesting that originally OM was an unquestionable boundary for you.

Hoping for some kind of good for you tonight b

[sandi2]

Just want to say that it's interesting that originally OM was an unquestionable boundary for you.

Me too, what changed your mind, Uphill?

[Uphill]

Honestly, I don't know? I wish I had an answer to that question for myself... I just love that girl. I will update on our convo I'm about an hour. I have another fire to put out quick

[Uphill]

Ok, where to start. When I walked in I said to her. I know my mind has been working overtime today, I'm sure yours was too. What do you think the future holds?

She actually opened up a bit which is unusual for her, talked about what "pushed" her away and her feelings. Gave me a lot of room to validate things. Lots of eye contact, lots of civil conversation.

My response to all that after she was done was that it is time to make a decision. (I know, not exactly DB standards). I said I will not sit back and be an backup plan, it is either now or never type thing. Explained how bad this whole situation has affected me and let her know I'm in if she can SHOW me she is.

I have no idea where this will go from here but I told her I need an answer by Friday. And if that answer is OM I'm closing the door for good m, as I won't sit here and know what is going on and continue to be thrown blows.

She says she understands my view on it, and realizes she continues to dogma her hole deeper. (I threw out a DB term here and said) I have tried to keep the path home as smooth as possible, but if you keep making more potholes, it's not gonna be passable.

Somewhere in there it was also brought up that "everybody hates her". I said nobody hates you, some people have come to me with concerns about how things went down but nobody hates you. We build a solid foundation for US and let everybody else fall in where they will.