Wow, mind is blown 9

[asitis]

And then maybe she grew up and was able to become her own rock so that she could be there for others? Story may still be writing itself. If she ever does come to the table, one of the issues that she'll need to work on, and between the two of you (you overcompensating responsibility & her undercompensating - the way a lot of M/R dynamics go astray)see if you can build a new dynamic that is more balanced.

Even if she isn't the one you end up working on a future R w/, it is a pattern that you'll want to address to avoid repeating it.

Not to change the subject - OK, it is - what fun things do you have planned for you or you and your S coming up? I don't want to stop you from talking, but a healthy balance of making sure you are looking at positive things in your life and plans is a good idea after exploring some of the darker paths we've taken and scary places we face.