Wow, mind is blown 9

[Uphill]

Honestly, I have no idea? Earlier on in this circus I call life, I would have definatly jumped at any oppourtunity with XF! If she were to call right now, I would definatly need to think about it for a while and see through the reasons for it.

My take on it all at this point (definatly some mind reading involved but no other way to process this) I think if XF ever had a change of heart, she would do and say all the right things to try to show me how much she wants to be with me. Then after settled back in, things would fall right back into our old R. Same habits, same cycles... She would over pursue and push me into distancing. Then yell because I'm distant. I would try to get "closer" and she push me back again?

Looking back, that is how we have been for 6 or 7 years. I would pull back because she would be "clingy". Call 5-10 times a day while I was trying to get work done. Then wonder why I was an hour late getting home. Well I had the same amount of work no matter how many times my phone rings. It was a cycle that repeated time and time again. Eventually she just gave up. Started distancing herself and I never pursued. I didn't notice until it was too late and she "was done".

Anyways, I'm rambling but I think I answered your question the best I could without guessing too much.