MLC Divorce and Cancer Continued

[LoisB]

Vge,

I know you want to support yourself and solve the insurance problem yourself... But, is this what the Lord is telling you to do?? OR, as I suspect, is this what YOU are thinking is your will right now?

You are sick. That's the bottom line. You are sick with an illness which could rob your children of their mother during an already traumatic time in their life.

While a FT job may solve the insurance issue, income issue... will it solve the illness issue? This, in my opinion, is your top priority... if, for no other reason, than the impact your loss would have on your kids. Do not leave them with your crazy ape-shid exH to raise.

So... having accepted your situation today... what can you do to build yourself up to a point where you are self-supporting and able to, healthily, handle all those responsibilities like a FT job??? And, kids? Etc...

I made the mistake about a year ago by pushing myself into a position where I thought I SHOULD be... as opposed to accepting where I was. If you take a blessing BEFORE you are ready for it, there's the potential you can make things worse than they are. I learned this the hard way.

While I would LOVE, LOVE, LOVE to be in a position today to give my daughters EVERYTHING they want... a paid-for college education and trip to Disney... my reality today... the reality God has given me... is that I need to build to that point. I'm still recovering from the trauma of the past 3.5 years... and, I'm still acquiring the skills I need to balance everything in a healthy way... HEALTHY way for me... Which may look differently than it looks for someone else.

Don't rush recovery. Slowly, steadily, build your strength until you are capable of handling the Blessings which I KNOW God will send when the time is right.

I needed to hear that today. Sometimes, when you stop, accept God's will for today, you are more able to see the blessings He is giving YOU TODAY... as opposed to the blessings you want in the future. I know that, for me, accepting His Will has brought more joy into my life than I ever imagined... It's just not wrapped in the paper I envisioned. Still a blessing though!