Btw, don't confuse stating a boundary with having a relationship talk. You don't "discuss" your boundary with her, you just state it. No asking for her cooperation or agreement. If she tries to pull you in to more talk, you turn and leave her. She doesn't have to agree with it, b/c you aren't asking her permission or approval, you are telling her your boundary. She doesn't have to like it. It is your boundary.....not hers.

Start with the lack of respect she shows. Take one at a time, b/c you don't need to make it a speech nor give her a list of things all together.

I don't think I would try and reword your boundary about the talking MR in front of the kids. You'll do better at wording on the next one.

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!