Firstly, if you act like getting to trick-or-treat with your son, just the two of you, is the best thing that could ever have happened, he's going to be just as excited. Last Halloween, with mom's full attention? How lucky can a kid get?
I have a feeling you know this, you're just distracted by the feeling of disappointment in your girls. They are normal self-centered teenagers. The teenage brain is all about self. They grow past it. H? Well, him disappointing you is nothing new. Brush it off, and have the best night possible.
Your paragraph before last has me really thinking. I am focusing on me, but am still distracted by H and his antics. I know I'm new at this, but dropping the rope is so hard. But...when I do, are you saying the old Judy should not die, too? Because I kind of think she needs to. Why would you advise for or against it?
I really am determined to be the best me I can be. The day may come so that it's just so H can eat his heart out or we R. That's just too much to think about. I want to be the best me possible so that I can actually enjoy life. I've had moments of joy, but can truly say I could give up living in a hurry because so far, it hasn't been that great. I want to change that for me and my children.
I'm writing down dreams, things I've always wanted to do...I'm trying to figure out who I am. Once I get an idea, I'll move on to goals.
I'm not pursuing D, by the way. I just have no choice because H is moving it along. I'm just not fighting it anymore, because it makes him so angry and dangerous. I think it's best for me if I just let him have what he wants, while doing my best to protect myself. I don't want to be D, but I'm too tired to fight him anymore. Focusing on me instead.
