Catching up a bit. I know with the emails you are trying to set a boundary but seems harsh. You don't have to respond until you want to. That actually may be more than trying to control her actions.
I think a boundary should be more of things that you would let no one do to you.

How should you act with her? Who knows but I do know I acted as I could care less with more women than I could count and it worked on all of them. It I was always nice and would do anything I could for them. I just didn't chase. Crazy. Not what I did after BD!

M 37
W 34

T 12
M 8
D 7
S 4

Need break 4/12/15
W no ring 7/7/15

Separate room 4/12/15
Separate living suggested 8/15
W moved out 11/1/15