Well I have finally stepped up for myself. Something I have never done and took courage to do it since i have always been stepped on. I finally saw my lawyer yesterday and paid my fees to get the process started. It actually took a lot of courage from my part knowing that weak character i have. I know that this is the last thing she expects from me and that is to act. I am doing a 180 on myself. I will fight for my daughters. She can file divorce herself. I will not let her disrespect me anymore. I am not alone in this path. (think positive think positive think positive)
Good that you are going to see the L about an amicable agreement on your daughters, but you keep playing that VICTIM role, unfortunately we don't all see you as the victim, I apologize if I am being too straight forward but..
She didn't run away from you because YOU liked being stepped on or because you never stood up for yourself, that doesn't make ANY sense...
Your W is running from YOU for a different reason and you are failing to acknowledge that and change that.
I wish you the best of luck, keep praying for GOD to guide you!
she ran away because she was neglected. she told me , in a way she felt abused. Because i wasnt there emotionally , and made her feel neglected. I have been working on that. I have gotten help thanks to my counselor. I was neglected as a kid and i was subconsciously doing the same to her. I have accepted her reason. I accepted my flaws.
so i guess im not a victim? -she physically abused me, twice. I have pictures. She blamed me for it because im stupid.
-she verbally abused me, names "selfish,worthless, good for nothing, not a good provider, bad husband , bad father, cant ever do anything right, PATHETIC.
- she psychologically abused me , making me believe every situation i was wrong and at fault, in the 5 yrs we were together she never once said sorry about anything. She forced me to get a second job on the weekend to meet her needs.
- she emotionally cheated on me , 3 times. She messaged her ex boyfriend that lives in Mx , to tell him she still loves him and missed him. and lied in my face. She blamed me for it too, because i made her do it. Because i give her no choice but to do it.
I wasnt emotionally there because i was always working for her, her house, her embroidery machine , her financial needs, I would get home tired, last thing i want is to talk on how she is feeling. Yes she is the victim here.
So I just found out my wife is looking for a lawyer after I told her i want her to stop disciplining my daughter the way she does. Like spanking them too hard , and covering their mouth while she spanks them , throwing them in the closet , throwing in cold water. physically abusing me. I think she thinks im going to take the girls away from her. but thats not the case.
Now i dont know if i should just change my request to a divorce instead of seeking my rights as a father. Since she can counter attack with divorce. Or should she file that , since that what she wants . Thats not what i want. Should i just throw the towel. And ask for a divorce.
If it's not what you want, why would you ask for a divorce?
If I recommended that you throw in the towel and ask for a divorce would you? Why is that my decision? If three other people agree with me would you then? Why would it be our decision?
Sounds like you're trying to out play her with this decision angel.
What do you want to do independent of your W?
Do that.
M 39 W 36 T5 M3 BD - 1/15 Separated - Same Day Served 9/15 D finalized 6/17
I dont know how to get her back the right way?? Ive told her i gotten help with my past being neglected. Ive gotten really close to God , which she is falling for because i used the church 1 year ago to show change (hypocrite) She is done with me. She doesnt believe in me no more. She told me to just let her go, it's over. And i guess im labeled as clingy for not agreeing with the divorce ? according to her
