I do want to try to build a new R and M, but the ball is firmly in his court. If he wants to work on our marriage he will have to initiate. He has some serious work to do on himself as well.
He knows perfectly well that I never wanted to give up on our marriage and have done everything possible to work on it and to work on myself.
I no longer initiate contact with him. When he does text me, I keep it light and brief. He can't come and see me anymore. We have had our first snowfall up here in cold and windy Canada. His only mode of transportation is his motorcycle and that is being put away for the winter this weekend. I have made no plans to go see him. Can't really afford to until my house sale goes through end of November.
He has huge problems expressing himself...now. He wasn't like that at the beginning of our relationship. He just clams up and stays silent. The most I get out of him is that he still loves me and then more silence.
I'm moving forward with my life. Finding a place to live. I'm going to stick around my area for a bit longer. I still need the support of my family and friends for the next little while. I have a fight on my hands with the disability company and many, many doctors appointments coming up. MRI and echocardiogram scheduled in the next few weeks to start. I will get better and get my illness under control.
Space and time for both of us....but I will not wait forever. If I have not seen any positive moves forward I will start D proceedings in April.
Di-mond in the rough M-45 H-38 My children S-25 D-23 T 5 M 4 H left April Fools Day 2015
