Sorry you are here too Oatmeal. Going dark is the chance to work on you and to allow your WW to go through the journey she needs to go through. Read the "going dark" thread in Cadet's post again. It is not about just NC, it's a chance for you to rediscover who you are, to detach from the drama, to clear your head, to start with a beginner's mind, to make yourself happy, etc.

I read through your sitch. Very similar to mine. The best advice I can give is to listen to the veterans who post on your thread. They've lived it and they know what works and more importantly, what doesn't work. You're only 3 weeks in, so take action early. I think I waited too long and well, you see where I am today.

Stay strong.


Me: 34
W: 30
Together: 11 years
Married: 4 years
BD: 4/2014
A Discovered: 5/2014
WW Filed: 7/2014
Separated: 8/2014
Divorced: 10/2015