Wow, mind is blown 9

[Uphill]

I guess it is just in my head that I could be DBing forever and never move on and never have a chance with XF?

I definatly don't want to turn the page and kick myself 6 months down the road. But 6 months from now if I think the same way this could go on forever. I've been on this rollercoaster since febuary. I swore on my life that if she ever left me I wouldn't look back. It would be her decision and she would have to live with it. Then in May she did move out. Thought, maybe this will do us some good and show her what she had in me.

Now, nearly 6 months later I feel as if I am growing as a person and doing some soul searching to fix myself, but it doesn't seem as if I am any closer to my end goal. Like I'm spinning my tires and wasting opportunities? There is a girl who was engaged whom I wouldn't give the time of day. She broke off her engagement to try to get with me. A marriage has been broken up for the same reasons! I told the female involved that she is married and I want nothing to do with her. She replied to me 2 weeks later that she won't be married much longer and moved out of thier home?!?! I never even replied to that message and haven't heard from her since. I have not pursued anything with anybody but honestly it's like women were waiting for this day? I have had some very promising "prospects" come out of the woodwork and I have blown them all off because I'm holding onto this hope. The question I have for myself right now is am I making the right decisions for me?