My emotions are all over the place this morning. I find myself feeling really angry at my wife, hurt by my wife, abandoned by my wife, betrayed by my wife. I also feel angry at myself. Then the self-pity kicks in, and I start feeling that victim mentality kick in, feeling sorry for myself, as if I didn't contribute anything to where I am at this stage in my life.
I can't help be upset for the fact that she is out there moving on, flirting, disregarding my feelings. I am working on forgiving it all, forgiving myself, her, her actions, my actions, everything. I honestly don't want to feel this way, and I promised myself that I won't let this turn me bitter, so I work on feeling my emotions and letting them go, but letting go isn't easy.
Wife is currently on business since Sunday and has not called to speak to the kids. I am trying so hard not to judge it but I feel bad and can't help it at times. I guess I am just looking at all the wrong things, in all honesty I am hurting, and still sadden by all of this.
Today's PMA
Quote of the day:
“No one can save me except myself.” - Susane Colasanti
