Parents: help me parenting while separated (2)

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My marriage.
During my marriage I would not share my feelings. My friends would know of certain emotions and events before my wife did.
A sex starved marriage syndrome developed.
I knew a marriage should not be like this and that something was deeply wrong, yet I did nothing to change the status quo.
Passiveness was how I was. By avoiding every single time discussing problems I hoped to get some more time to breathe until the next time.
My W became more and more bitter towards me.
I was afraid of her, of confronting her, even when she despised me.
At a certain point I started hating my M. In order to be able to bear it and I made a promise to hold on until my youngest son would go to college. I did nothing to change things.
And then the Bomb was dropped.
I did all the initial mistakes.
In November 2014 I found this forum.
I bought the DR and read it all.
I started applying the LRT.
In January 2015 W announced she would only stay in this foreign land until June 2015, when the kids would start their school holidays.
I started sleeping on the MBR floor.
I established several goals:
- I want to stay in the same room without discomfort;
- I want to still be together by April;
- I want to sleep in the same bed with W;
- I want to look into her eyes and smile when the kids do something funny, and her into mine;
- I want for her to initiate some conversation about trivial matters with me;
- I want for her to come with us on our family trips during school breaks.
I became distant but polite.
I focused even more on my kids. They were my main GAL. I became a very good dad, firm and attentive to their needs.
I started going for walks after dinner.
Slowly I started feeling the ice melting away. W started touching me occasionally.
12 April I decided I should sleep in the bed, which I did with no opposition.
We started slightly touching in bed.
End of May in bed I held her without opposition.
We started having very long conversations in bed, during which I was able to share my feelings as never before. W said I was a different person.
In June we reconciled. W decided to stay abroad with me one more year. She extended her unpaid leave until 2016. We enrolled the kids for one more year at school.
During that period I started acting again as her husband, treating her as my precious princess.
In July the kids and she flew home.
W stopped contacts until I flew home in August. She then said she wanted to divorce me. I did not expect this at all.
September 2015 she found a new flat for her and the kids.
I started again to put some distance between us but we acted as a regular family.
1 October the kids and she moved out.
My present main goals, considering that I do not want to get W back any more (que sera sera):
- To know myself and understand how and why I became to be who I am;
- To become aware of my feelings;
- To express my feelings;
- To stop being ashamed of wanting what I want.
- To keep practicing on my kids what I learned by reading the book “Raising an emotionally intelligent child”.
What I have accomplished so far:
- I shave every day and put cologne for the first time in my life;
- I started playing classical guitar after a 20 year stop;
- I started freely listening to classical music without being ashamed of it;
- I started therapy with an IC. It has been a wonderful experience of self-discovery.
- I started meditating regularly after having taken part on an online course.
- I take my kids on long trips abroad without feeling guilt or empty because W is not coming.
- I am currently taking a Berkeley online course on Happiness. This is my main GAL activity, with several practical exercises to be done as homework.
- I exercise regularly at home, since I don’t have time to go to a gym.
- I have connected with my mother, sister and younger brother, with my uncle and aunt, after several years of superficial attachment. I keep regular contact with them and open myself to them.
- I read almost daily DB Forum, which is my main source of inspiration.