If you spouse isn't doing exactly what you hoped for, don't withhold praise and positive feedback. When you encourage small steps along the way, your spouse will see you as an ally rather than an enemy, and be much more likely to want to please you. With any luck, s/he might eventually get it "right".
Still crickets. But I am kinda sure who ever talks first loses in this sit. So I am going to be sure I do not talk first.
Then, no matter how much he gives me (I have zero hopes at this point he will give me the whole 350), I will thank and praise him for his ...cough... outstanding ...cough.... effort in providing for his kids.
Yeah, there is no way I will call it outstanding
How about,
"Thanks, I would have really struggled to make it to my next paycheck 2 weeks from now if you would not have helped. I know you are trying to pay back people who have helped you these last 2 months and you are trying to save for your new place, and I know this was not easy for you."
I put him in the light of provider (something he is COMPLETELY not used to), savior (again, something he rarely ever hears) and I let him know he put me and the kids as a higher priority than other people (something he has not done in a long time) and I show I see him sacrifice what he is working for...
Why does doing this make me feel nauseous. I really want to call him a pathetic SOB for making his kids beg him for help...
But if I do it the right way, who knows, maybe next paycheck he will offer to buy the girls a shirt or something else to help, since this time went so well...right?
Me: 42 H: 45 M: 18 yrs T: 20 yrs D: 17 D: 15 S: 12 I kicked him out 8/21/15 I will DB until March 21st 2017, that is it!
