Yeah I feel for ya, man. What I am beginning to see is that detachment is really just the first step towards being more mature emotionally so that a mature, healthy relationship is possible.
Getting so attached (addicted perhaps?) to our spouses so that we expect them to give us their best when we're not giving ours, or trying to hang on to them at all costs when they're being destructive to the R is, I'm coming to see, what an 18 year old might do. When we become men we're supposed to put childish ways behind us.
The more progress I make in this direction (and believe me, so far it ain't much!), I'm realizing and feeling far more pain over my poor behavior and how I let her down than I am hurt over the separation, her wanting to divorce, and even the lousy things she did. And I see far more clearly how much work it will take to piece it all back together if that opportunity even arises.
