D - You've been on my mind all morning. I think because our situations are a bit similar. Your wife seems so confused, just like my H.
I don't know where you live, so I'm suggesting you check out the basic link for Retrouvaille. Check and see if there's something in your area. The website gives suggestions for getting a reluctant spouse to go. The program has a success rate of 80% for saving marriages. Type in the name followed by .org
If you can talk her into going, just to see if it might help you co-parent more easily (official excuse) you just might be able to communicate better, and have a great chance at saving your M.
I've seen it mentioned all over this website, so I hope I don't get in trouble for suggesting it.
