I'm with Py here. Can you imagine what the Christmas Day party is going to be like if you're there? Your H sat there, with a D axe hanging over your head, singing mistletoe and wine, expecting you to be the dutiful W, smiling and happy, just so he can put on a show for your MIL. No way, no thanks.
Your H has to start making some real steps to not want a D before you continue at all with him. He doesn't seem to be making any noises in that direction, so, Christmas without him seems more favourable than being sat round a table pretending to be something you're not.
M 45 W 52 SD22 S9 D8 BD 6 April 2015 Not living together 4 Dec 2015