Wonka

Usually I would agree with you more than 100% but in this sitch I think it is slightly different.

PP has had very serious addiction problems which he has bravely overcome to recover. He has attended a 12 step program. This is tough on spouses especially in the addictive phase, I know this as my WH was a compulsive gambler, smoker and now unrecovered alcoholic.

Also a WAW is a different dynamic, even if W is now dating.

A very hard line stance I believe in any compulsive sitch isn't going to be healing. From my experience with spouses of compulsives the first step to healing lies in friendship, the spouse of a compulsive has to be sure that the compulsion is gone for good. Leaving by a WAW in those circumstances is very different, more in sorrow than anger.

The WAW hasn't seen friendship at the point of walk away and therefore I believe won't even think about missing it. In fact that kind of R is so damaged that missing it is the last thing you want the spouse of a compulsive to feel. Those memories of being with a compulsive and the R are best left to be a part of the story. The compulsive often has to over atone to repair the R. Very few WAW would offer an olive branch once away from a compulsive, it's too risky.

More power to PP for the obvious changes he has made, instead a light neighbourly friendship with I have more work to do on PP sounds right to me.

Friendship is a great start to a new R.

Just my 2c.

V

Last edited by Vanilla; 10/12/15 04:36 PM.
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose.
V 64, WAW