I have a different view than Lady V and Asitis in terms of telling W maybe can consider being friends in the future. That will not work in DBing because she will not feel true loss of the friendship. You don't have to be an a$$ when you convey it to W. I would frame it as "friends don't do this to their friends." Sandi reports being shocked into her senses when her H told her that he won't be friends after D...same with with Starsky and CaliGuy.
If W tries to rope you into a discussion about the dinner invite declination, just state calmly and firmly that you are not being comfortable being buddies with someone who is ripping apart a family and actively trying to block you from seeing your kid. This is not what friends do here. Again, I would state matter of factly that you will not be friends with her after D and that this is the path she chose without any consultation from you.
