Good morning family,

Another day has passed and I am feeling a bit better. Still with the feeling of hurt and sadness; the thoughts about the flirtatious conversations and the fact that my wife is distant; when she calls is to check up on the boys and how they are (which should be expected), it does hurt that she doesn't call to see how I am doing, even though after she speaks to the boys she begins to have a conversation with me (I don't know if I should take this as a positive or if I am being friend zoned).

I miss my wife daily and think about how she is doing during this time. I also can't help these ANTs (Automatic Negative Thoughts) that pop up telling me that she might be just reaching out to OMs to get that sense of emotional needs met. Crazy, how one can slip up and end up at the beginning.

Today I started the day with joining a prayer line, meditating, and listening to Joel Osteen.

Here is my PMA for the day:

Quote of the day:

“Don’t be afraid to stand tall in YOUR truth! Boldly and confidently face everything that has, and is, keeping you bound. Fight for your inner peace! Fight for your happiness! Fight for everything and everybody that’s important to you! You are NOT a victim! Don’t even play into that. You owe it to yourself to LIVE! Live your life without the regrets, without the resentments, without the unforgiveness, without the blame game, without the self-pity, without any and everything that keeps you from experiencing true joy within! You are too important to waste your life away! Learn to appreciate and value your life, but most importantly, learn to appreciate and value yourself! You count too, no matter what you’ve done!”
- Stephanie Lahart

Video of the day:

Love yourself: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SlO_u6T9sP0

I have been noticing that my last few post has reverted back to focusing on my wife, I guess I can't blame myself as she is going through something which is hard, and it saddens me that this is also all happening at the same time, and that if everything was as it was, we would all be there supporting each other; with that said, I need to stop wasting this energy with focusing on her and again refocus it on me, and my boys. I will continue to support my wife throughout this, but need to start loving myself again as I feel as I am neglecting myself right now.

God Bless


M: 34 W: 33
S: 7
S: 14 months
BD: 6/2015
Separation: 6/2015
Back and Forth between Home and Moms