Am not sure where I belong now

[Zues126]

I will add I've had a better R with my kids than ever. YET- 9 months ago I lost my temper. S and D were fighting, and I lost my cool. Son locked himself in the bedroom. I forced the door open with my shoulder. He was scared. I was yelling.

I cooled down quickly. We talked through it. I acknowledged that I was human and that while this wasn't the way I should act, I couldn't promise never to do it again. But I DID promise that I would never hurt him. We talked about it. He has his own challenges.

And you know what? We have a great R. He loves me, I love him, we can get upset now and then and it's ok.

And you know what else? My D was 10 times more angry than I was. He didn't beat me, but he did believe in spanking, and did that in a rage a few times. I WAS scared of my dad - ***WHEN HE WAS MAD***. But I loved him, never thought anything of it, and you know what? I have a GREAT relationship with him.

To me this reaction is just a sign that M isn't possible anymore. Everyone deserves better.