Yesterday was a good day, I did not think of STBX when I woke up. I feel as I am finally accepting and moving forward. Told my mum and siblings of my situation and impending D. My mum was more supportive than I expected and just told me not to think of this anymore and try to be happy.
I was so proud that I was able to say something without breaking down in tears. Told me to leave him alone if H has had a change of heart, he will understand and regret later when he is older. It caught in my throat, but no tears and was not a babbling wreck which would what would of happened a couple of months ago.
A few months ago, I thought I would not be able to do this as not telling meant the hope in me was huge and that a turn around would happen.
The recent developments re finances has ironically helped me to move forward and stop me from seeing H with such rose tinted specs!
Moving forward now, progress does happen. Detachment does happen. I realise now it was up to me to decide when that would be and that has put me in a much stronger and better place. Do I still love H, yes. Do I still think of my situation and him every day, yes. However it is no longer the overriding hurt and thoughts anymore.
Hugs and prayers to those of us on this path. Time is the key.
Smothy x
Both 47 M 20 T25 S 18 EA July 11- Jan 12. ILYBNILWY Oct EA April 13 -July 13 Move to work abroad Sept 14 re establish contact with OW while away D bomb 22/12/14 D filed papers served 17/03/15
