Still riding the waves

[mleigh4]

Had a decent and quiet week, but feeling a bit blah the last couple of days.

Monday night, I had asked H if I could run with S by the Halloween store that is near his place on my way to drop S off. H had said sure and that he would like to meet up with us there. Sure enough he followed through. We picked out some fun stuff. H helped S to pick out a costume. At checkout, I suggested splitting up the costume from the party items. H said why? That we would be together on Halloween. I pointed out that the bucket load of stuff I was getting was for the party. He said Oh, was quiet for a moment, then said, well I want to come to the party!? He had the person ring it up and paid on the joint card that we split.

I decided on Tue to reach out with a random text asking if he got his new phone. He responded right away that no he had not. I just felt like testing a random text out....to see

Had a mountain lion sighting on the street next to us. We have large lots with no fences near the foothills. We get turkey and many deer, which brings the mountain lions. But we have never had one so close! Don't worry Job, I am being extra cautious with the fur babies! That info I TM to H, but got no response.

Last night I had a work dinner party to attend. Smooze time with real estate agents. All was fine until the DJ started with that horrible wedding music, you know what I mean, those same old songs you have heard a zillion times. Anyway, not my type of dance music. I was getting a lot of sass for being a wallflower, I just was not in the mood! Brought on a little anxiety, I was happy when we finally left. For some reason, H was heavy on my mind, was watching other couples and feeling envious....

Today, I made a big move....I got my OWN Costco membership! H is on daddy's account and I always need him to take me...but no more...NOW H will know I mean serious business

But really, I joke, but I really feel like I am slowly cutting those little ties...where I am no longer dependent. Feels really good!

Not much in plans this weekend. I have S and we will decorate and get ready for our party next weekend. However, like I mentioned, feeling a little blue. I have these moments when I so miss H, miss having companionship, miss having someone to hang out with and talk to. And I just feel SO OVER THIS! Sipping my glass of wine...alone