Can ALL marriages be saved?

[Mona52]

Hi Gmum,
I know this is so hard, but you can totally do this. I know when he goes away you will be scared he will move on. His emotions are probably going through similar waves as yours are. Be honest, there are times when you feel like kicking him to the curb, right? He will have those exact same feelings. Flip that coin over though. He will also go through times when he will miss you both and wonder if he made a mistake.

If you can possibly pull away from his craziness and make some uber positive changes in your life right now, his feelings of wondering if he made a mistake will grow and grow.

I cannot remember who it was, but I remember a post that was on here a while ago. I think it was from a WAW. She was in reconciliation with the LBS and i think they were posting their journey, but it was years ago, so I may be wrong.

But this person explained what a LBS is to a WA. Think about going to work every day and one day a new person starts and you say Hi to them at the water cooler. Well, because you smiled and said hi to them, they attached themselves to you. Every day they would invite you to lunch or figure out where and when you were having lunch and show up there. Through out the day they would come into your office to chat about nothing and see if you wanted to stop for a few drinks after work.
You never drank water anymore, because every time you went near the water cooler they would be there, desperately trying to become friends with you.

Soon you started to close your office door completely and you peeked around corners at work before heading to the bathroom.

It is possible you and this person could have become friends, if you had some space and time to want it, without it being thrust upon you at every turn.

Now suppose this person finally gets the hint and stops the constant barrage of friend requests. Now, when you see them in the hall, you nod. Soon, you are able to get water again, and every once in a while, they are getting water too. Since they do not force it, you relax enough to finally have some short conversations with them that you initiate. Finally, you are the one who includes them when a group of you go out to lunch. If that person has some interesting things going on in their lives, now is the time you will finally see that. Before, it did not matter one bit what their lives were outside of work, you were not interested.

All you need to do now is take that focus WAY off him and what he thinks and what he feels. You need to get some nice and healthy obsessions about things just for YOU. I promise you, nothing in this life is impossible. Right now you have the gift of time to NOT worry about him and aim for things in life you want. aim BIG, even if you fall short you still will be much higher.