Three years ago things were bad between my W and I and we nearly broke up my children were fighting a lot my W and I were arguing things were bad I spoke to my two eldest children and said that we all have to try to make mummy happy we all had get along with each other pull together to keep our family together.
One of the reasons that I want to keep us all together in the house is to try to make things better with my W and I realise this is going to be extremely difficult to do and I now also realise that I have a very sad and upset daughter that I also would love to build a relationship with but I do not know if this will be possible either.
OMG, Ghost. Do you not see it? You made the kids believe that it's all about making mummy happy!
I think the reason you gave for not being close to your 17 yr old daughter is pathetic. You took your childhood resentment toward your sister and took it out on your child. Then you saw history repeating itself between your daughter and son. Guess you did not learn from it.
Girls need their father! A girl's relationship with her father is so important. If my father had said those words to me, I would think he didn't care about my feelings at all. He only cared about making mummy happy.
There use to be a man who posted about his awkward R with his D. B/c he saw the D and his W spending more time together, he just assumed that once they divorced he would never see his D very much. He was just going to resign to live a lonely life. We continued talking with him, and long story short......his D was starving for his one on one attention. The son he was so close to, married and had little time for dad.
Why can you feel "normal" toward the baby girl, yet you basically rejected the oldest girl? Yes, I'm sure she must have some serious issues, if she's cutting herself. Has she been in therapy?
I am really sad to hear about this situation. I also couldn't help to wonder why you decided to talk about it now. I have noticed that when you get a couple of posts trying to cheer you on.......it's almost as if you go to the closet to find something else to pull out. So what is it, Ghost? What was the real reason for sharing this about your daughter?
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
