Mattdad I agree with Azzork. You set a boundary and she crossed it. You can't accept this. From what you've posted you have let her walk over you in the past. How much longer can you live like this
The thing with DBing is you can start today It doesn't matter what's happened upto now it's how you deal with it going forward.
Please start a new thread. You've reached the 100th posting/reply count.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.