I've been thinking over the phone call with H yesterday (first one in a while) and thinking about what I did right and wrong.
Good: I didn't interrupt what I was doing to answer the phone. I waited until he texted me and then called him back. Good!
Bad: I told him why I didn't answer the phone. I was finishing up a Pilates class. I think no big deal to say what you were doing. I wouldnt go out of your way to apologize for missing his call.
Good: I didn't offer to fix his phone account online access issue. I explained what I thought was going on because I was having the same problem. Not saying you did, but try not to tell him what to do either. Speak from your experiences: "I had to do XXX and YYY when I had ZZZ happen." vs. "You need to XXX and YYY." But good that you didnt jump in to be the hero!
Bad: I asked him if he had done a "change of address" at the post office and told him he also really needs to change his contact information at the hospital. While you dont want to say "you need to...", sometimes, it may impact you. If you are getting his bills or if you are on his account and he cant pay things, etc, its important to let him know that these things arent done.
Good: I didn't ask why he was at the hospital. When he told me why I said I was sorry but didn't dwell on it. Good!
Good: I shared some information he needed regarding me preparing the house for sale. Signals that I am moving on. Good
Bad: I extended the conversation too long. He was the one that ended it. Ugh. Ah well. Learn for next time!
