Where to begin?

[Dawgs]

Thank you, Thornton. Once again you have provided valuable info.

This detaching is just driving me crazy. Since she still lives in the house it makes it that much harder - she won't move out because she is leaving in early December to go to her new base and she wants to spend time with the kids before she goes. Which, for the life of me, I can't figure out why she felt going to her new base alone when we are supposedly working on us and being away from the kids would be a good idea. I just can't see it. As a friend said, what mother would want to leave her kids by moving to another state and just seeing them on the weekends (same friend said that she wouldn't be surprised if the visits back became less and less)? Doesn't make sense to me.

I see your point on the toys. The only real question is why was the one in her work bag - which sends my overactive and crazy mind into all sorts of scenarios. To see my youngest pick it up was a shock!

Now, we are trying full separation. Some days she is much nicer than others. It seems that she is just waiting to pounce on something. Like yesterday, for example, an innocent comment was completely taken the wrong way - the way she "perceives" things as she said. I don't get the "well, for xx years you didn't do it..." spitefulness as much, but it still appears. It almost is as if whatever I am working on and trying to change, she is waiting. I am almost at the breaking point. I love her so very much but I just don't know how much of all this I can take anymore. Now, she isn't mean and we get along great working on becoming "comfortable" with each other and being friends. As I said, she backed off of the papers and wanted to go back to separation again...she said a couple of weeks ago (when stating that she wanted to go ahead and file) was that she didn't know if she was making the biggest mistake of her life. Maybe her heart is softening. I just wish she would give me some sort of sign...