LBH w/ a WW trying to save my M

[gs9]

Got to figure out how to drag my feet and slow this process down. Give God as much time to work as possible.

God doesn't need your help. He is big enough to handle things in His own way and in His own time. (I know, I try to give God suggestions all the time. ).

Of course you're right. God doesn't need our help. He needs me to give it to Him and take my hands off so He can work on our behalf.

I don't know that I agree that the LBS should drag their feet to slow the process down. B/c when you drag your feet, you are resisting her. All it really accomplishes is in her getting more angry and maybe sticking it to you more....b/c she's mad. I do agree that she needs to take care of the paperwork, etc. But if you are focused on what to do to slow things down, it takes away your attention on what you need to do to change the dynamics of the relationship.

Who knows, it may take a D to open her eyes.

Oddly, I just got off the phone with her XH. He said the same thing about dragging my feet. He has been a great support through this whole process and until today he said I should not leave the house. I should reclaim the MBR. I should not let her push me around. However, today he said maybe I should consider moving out. She's not going to move out. Maybe if I moved out it would give us the space we need to alleviate tension and appreciate each other again, it wouldn't make her mad and could buy us some more time and slow down the divorce. He is the first one, besides my WW, who has said maybe I should move out and give her the space she's asking for. It would definitely change the dynamic. It's giving her what she is asking for and I could negotiate it in order to slow down the divorce process. Right now we are basically separated but living in the same house and she has made it clear she is not leaving. She had originally said if I wouldn't leave she would but I asked her about it this weekend and she said she's not moving to an apartment with the kids. Which in itself is BS bc she expects me to.
I have offered several times to sit down with a one of our IC's to create a structured/guided separation but she doesn't trust my IC, her IC said she couldn't do it bc WW is her client. I even offered to have her IC recommend someone. WW refused so far.
So my thoughts are it's only been a week since I reclaimed the MBR and there have been some changes this last week. However if the changes stop or take steps backwards I'll email both of our IC's and ask them to give us guidelines for a separation agreement. Then propose it while negotiating slowing down the D process....Maybe 3 months.
Thoughts?